Corruping a wish game

This is how this kind of game works. Firstly you are going to grant the wish made by the forum member who posted above you, and at the same time corrupting it in whatever way you wish to make it different than what the previous user originally intended.

I'll start:

I wish i can dance

Granted

But when you dance your yansh shakes alot

I wish I can dream

Granted

But if you dream that is a symptom of witch craft

I wish i can sing

One man called Buhari is a good man but that

Granted 

but if you sing your voice wil quickly crack

I wish i can eat

Granted

But eating to much go make you have longer troat.

I wish I can love.